Why Kids Need to See Themselves in Stories
The first time you see yourself in a book, something shifts…
like the world finally remembered you exist.
For a child, the first time they see themselves in a story, their world widens and so does their sense of who they’re “allowed” to become.
Let’s Start With An Uncomfortable Truth
Most of us grew up reading stories that didn’t look like the lives we lived.
No girls with chronic illnesses.
No little Black girls with southern roots and big imaginations.
No kids who felt deeply but kept it all inside.
When I was a little girl, I loved books. I read them, collected them, even slept with them. But no matter how many I pulled from the library shelves or bought at school book fairs, I rarely found a character who looked like me.
I longed to see myself in the pages I loved so dearly… a little girl with poofy curls, caramel skin, and dimples.
That absence left a void:
Do I belong?
It wasn’t just about skin tone or hair texture.
It was about feeling invisible in a world that told other children through story after story that their families, dreams, and everyday lives were worthy of being centered.
Representation is not just a buzzword to me;
it’s the very soil I grew from.
Kids Deserve Mirrors, Not Just Windows
You’ve probably heard before that children’s books should act as “windows and mirrors.”
Windows help kids see into other people’s lives.
Mirrors help them see themselves.
But here’s the thing:
mirrors are the ones that allow kids to appreciate themselves, not just others.
When a child sees someone who looks like them, speaks like them, lives like them, feels like them, or has a family like theirs… something unlocks.
It’s like being found.
A quiet knowing.
A gentle confidence.
A sense of, “I belong here too”.
Not seeing yourself in stories doesn’t ruin you, but it absolutely shapes you.
Sometimes all you need is to see yourself to believe in yourself. Because in its absence, a loud inner voice can convince you that your story isn’t worth telling.
Representation Builds Confidence Without Saying A Word
When children only see one type of hero, one type of family, one type of life, they learn that this is the “norm” and everything else is “different.”
But when they grow up reading diverse stories; of different races, cultures, religions, abilities, and body types, they learn that humanity is wide, beautiful, and interconnected.
This is why representation is not optional.
It is foundational.
Children (and our inner children) are sponges.
They absorb messages long before they understand the language.
They notice:
who the hero is
who gets to be magical
who is seen as kind
And they also notice when they are missing.
You can tell a child all day long, “Sweetheart, you are worthy,” and they will still absorb what’s unsaid in their books and in the world around them.
Sometimes all it takes is seeing:
a girl with poofy curls
a boy with their same skin tone
a child with a mobility aid
a character with invisible struggles
Books can write what the world often forgets to say.
What the Research Shows
My story is not unique.
For decades, researchers have tracked the gaps in racial and cultural representation in children’s books. Data from the Cooperative Children’s Book Center shows that most books published still feature white protagonists. And while representation of children of color has increased since the 1990s, many characters are still written as sidekicks, stereotypes, or background noise, not central voices.
Psychologists remind us why this matters.
Children notice race as early as six months old and can show bias as early as preschool.
That means by the time they start school, they’re already forming beliefs about who matters.
Stories are one of the most powerful ways to shape those early impressions.
Invisible Illnesses Deserve Visible Stories
Let’s talk about the children who don’t “look sick” but spend their days battling:
dizziness
migraines
anxiety
fatigue
sensory overload
and the quiet grief from a trauma nobody talks about
Children with:
chronic illnesses
medical trauma
separation trauma
overlooked disabilities
quiet resilience
Rarely see themselves unless the story is tragic or exists to teach someone else a lesson.
But their strength is real.
Their experience is real.
Their stories matter.
Not as cautionary tales, but as human, gentle, and valid.
Not all bravery comes with capes, fairy dust, or dragons.
Sometimes bravery is showing up at school after a night of pain.
Sometimes it’s saying, “No, something is wrong,” even when the doctor dismisses them.
Sometimes it’s being soft in a world that demands loudness and visual toughness.
Stories Help Children (and Grown Folks) Heal Generational Invisibility
Representation isn’t just for the child.
It’s for the parent who never saw themselves in books.
For the mother whose family structure was never portrayed gently.
For the daughter who learned to shrink because her struggles weren’t validated.
For the grandmother who held the family together from a quiet rocking chair.
When a story honors the overlooked, it doesn’t just comfort a child,
it repairs something in the lineage.
Why I Wrote Always There, Rocking Chair
As a kid, I made blanket forts and crawled into small, quiet places. I found comfort in corners and crevices.
The rocking chair in my story is inspired by a pillar of comfort for my family; the chair that witnessed joy, arguments, growth, and silence.
Chairs listen.
They hold.
They witness.
Just like the quiet, resilient children I write for.
This book is:
for the kids who feel everything deeply
for the ones who observe instead of speak
for the ones overlooked because their strength isn’t loud
and for the adults who once needed a story like this
It shows that after the storm, we may be changed, but we are still whole, still worthy, still evolving.
Always There, Rocking Chair opens for pre-order January 2026.
If you want updates, behind-the-scenes exclusives, and early bonuses, join the newsletter Letters From Tyberiana and our Launch Team.
Practical Ways to Support Representation
Whether you’re a parent, teacher, caregiver, or book lover here are some ways to be intentional about representation:
1. Audit your bookshelf.
Look at the books you own or share. Whose stories are present? Whose voices are missing?
2. Seek out diverse authors.
Representation isn’t only about characters it’s also about who writes the story. Support authors of color, indigenous authors, disabled authors, and others who bring lived experience into their work.
3. Talk about what you read.
Books open doors for conversation. Ask children how they see themselves in a story. Ask how they see others.
4. Start young.
Don’t wait until middle school to talk about race or difference. Research shows children notice far earlier than we think.
5. Write your own stories.
If you or your child can’t find a story that reflects your reality, write it. Representation begins with the courage to speak up.
Key Takeaways (for the 1-minute readers)
Representation helps children feel seen, valued, and capable.
Books shape identity, confidence, and emotional development.
Children with invisible illnesses or quiet personalities deserve to see themselves too.
Inclusive stories help heal generational patterns of invisibility.
Thanks for sitting with me awhile.
Until next time my friend,
Tybre’ana